Eye(!) Scribbles….

Morning 5:30 AM

Lazy bones wakes up to drive mom to the stadium for her morning walk. Only solace is Suprabatham played in 92.7 Fm @ about 5:50. What a peaceful thing to listen to early in the morning…

Mom alights from the car to go on with her walking session. Lazy bones settles backs on a cozy pillow with reclined seat and fresh early morning breeze minus the pollution with a bonus of bird’s chirping. Lost in the magic of MS’s beautiful rendition I was experiencing an amazing sense of relaxation. The suprabatham is over and then begins an absolutely ridiculous rap song . No offence to the rap song rendition or artists who perform rap. I do like it too. But the most hapless part of the entire song was that the song was a rap- remix of “Aha na pelli anta” song from the all time classic “Maya bazaar” . The anger and irritation that started at that minute for me made me start writing again today after a very long time. That way I am thankful to that poor guy who calls himself the ‘music director’ of that movie in which this remix was included.

Rap music is one form of rendering rhythmic rhyming words in a specific pattern. And I am myself a big fan of lot of those works which I have usually come across in many movies. But the most sad part of the Indian Movie industry is they make such a terrible adaptation of music from other countries and cultures that the original artists would hang their heads in shame.

The one that our ‘telugu’ music director did with the time less classic was an absolute ruining of the master piece along with making rap music sound like some gibberish. Is it the desperation to popularize their work  in one way or the other? or is it to make themselves heard? I feel all these new generation music directors who make a futile attempt at creating some thing new, are people who want to scream on the top of their voices and want themselves to be popular.

What we need is some innovation and not imitation!

What we need is some sensible music not some screaming!!

What we need is some ‘music’ not some madness!!!

I hope i will continue to write again and again till that guy stops making these kind of disastrous attempts ever again.. Hope it reaches him!!!

PS : I like to keep my writing short.

You’ve fought the wildest winds of Life,

With willingness and valour,

You’ve walked the loneliest of the nights,

Without the slightest of fear,

As you walk these final steps,

With a million wishes from the Motherland,

This is to wish you a safe and successful win .

A friend of mine had asked me to write a few lines about a celebrity for a very important forthcoming  event of her life and voila!!! this is what I could blurt out it’s totally surprising for me:)

I must accept I am very indisciplined when it comes to blogging. Never mind coz I haven’t signed up any contracts   Last few weeks in my life have been so normal and peaceful that I sometimes ask my siblings to pinch me to feel it is all so real. From the day I have landed in this country I have been coming across so many new things that the list goes endless.

I just love the almost zero pollution environment here.

The traffic discipline!!!! amazingly depressing…sometimes i feel like walking out of the car running away. I know i know the safety first thing …so good about it but ya i miss the hyderabadi autowallah’s torture turns . You can be sure to end up on a hospital bed even if you are following traffic rules . Here your saved from that .

The houses how perfectly planned and lined up they are!! I feel the best part about them being like that is how much ever junk you dump around , the houses still look great!So ideal for someone like me.

The way some stranger on the side walk looks into your face and wishes you a hi how are you doing today with a sunshine smile..

The way people binge on tempting calorie filled foods and the way they just rush to the gym to burn it all out. Balancing acts huh!!!  Just the way they sit back and enjoy life unlike so many of us who are always on a run to achieve things than accomplish them.

The way you can take up any hobby that appeals to you just by walking into a store. The way they stack up their stores meticulously. Ah!! how I dream of a day when I can wake up and become a carpenter when I want to make frames for my photo works. (the outcome doesnt matter you get to try your hand at it atleast buddy)

I hate to compare it all with anything back home just for some reasons like how much we lag behind when compared with them.

WE have a very small piece of land with too many humans eating out of it.

So with no comparisons I can say I just am in love with this nation for many more reasons. The list will never end.

I shall scribble again!!! See ya…

This is the start of a series  that I wish to call Andhra to Amrika…

I am not someone who writes down everything in a diary.Maintaining a travelogue, remembering dates and saving my first ticket, thatz no me.

The first time I was sitting alone in the airport lounge waiting for the flight, I thought may be I would be flooded with the anxiety of leaving the country and going.

Nothing of that sort happened. I was rather more relaxed.What other feelings would a person going to the US for a month of vacation have.

All the 25 hours of flying was neither tiring nor exciting except that I got to watch too many movies to watch.This was when I was again learning another lesson for life.

NEVER DETEST ANYTHING IN LIFE TOO MUCH. I ALWAYS HATED WATCHING MOVIES.

Unless I was bored of working or doing everything else on this earth I watched movies. And here I was stuck with a monitor in front of me for 25 hours to do nothing but stare at them.

But the minute I land here in “the” US of A, I feel the difference. How everything is IN order.Everything is so disgustingly in order that I feel freaked out….

She is the centre of our world.

She makes our lives complete.

For people who don’t know her, she is just another one of those million middle class house wives who struggle their entire lives at home sacrificing their ambitions and dreams for their families. 

But for us she is the person who has shaped up our lives to a meaningful start. She has helped us realise what we are worth aiming for in life. 

She is so wrong in so many ways. I feel bad how a person like her is not being punished for her mistakes. 

She says she never helped the family in moving to a better financial status. 

She says she never earned our diwali gifts.

She says she was never able to buy me a pair of pearl studs that i wanted all my childhood.

We never know as to when she will realise how much she has contributed towards what we are today. 
What  will make her realise what she is for us!!!

Everytime she feels low of having lower performance levels it startles me…

Her lack of performance includes when she cant work for another extra hour after a 12 hour household work shift..:)

Her journey began from an obscure sleepy village that waited for a week for the drinking water to arrive during floods.Today she an epitome for something called a “Complete Women” for me. 

She inspires me to look forwards in life for challenges.

She inspires me to be the best mom I can be to my kids in future.. 

Thanks MOM… We Love You …

This article is the preface of a book I write for her.

Every day I settle down to write the daily post, I begin to wonder what I will be writing about. Had a sumptuous Sunday meal just now J.Well the menu’s a typical telugu  one (keeping in view the number of overseas friends and relatives who read my entries daily i keep away from writing it’s details )Last night was tough with power cut, but see it is technology again that has saved me .I had my laptop fully charged and the saved playlists saved me.

How time stands still when music takes over....

Music has always been an integral part of my life. And the genre spans over a huge range. Nothing in particular like a favourite artist or band. Most of the times, language is no barrier- Latin beats to carnatic classical, everything entices me.  But ya M S amma’s rendering of the timeless carnatic music  always is a divine solace for me. While I have continued to train myself always in rendering vocal music  I always selected the versions to be either carnatic or telugu light music.

But when it came to something that kept my mood upbeat or lifted my spirits, the choice has always been too shocking for people who know me. To all the readers who are familiar with telugu music my choice of songs always revolves around mass and folk beats.36-24-36 , aakalesthe annam pedtha, and nuv whistle esthe Andhra soda.. J)

It startles me when I hear my peer group speak of Akon , Linking Park and whatever.They never attracted my ears as much as these local “mana” beats attracted my attention. And ya I do listen to foreign bands too But they are a bit oldies. ABBA and Boney M . Ya! My choice of things has always been different from my counterparts.My friends and relatives always make fun of my choice of music. But I feel music transcends barriers of language,genre and importantly TIME  for me.It is something that makes me forget my worries, soothes my tense nerves and importantly permits me to learn it so that I can sing it to myself whenever I feel like. One reason as to why the typical popular bands and music don’t  appeal to me is, the lack of clarity in music and lyrics.Though all the bands don’t  give music like head banging stuff, I don’t feel relaxed singing a slang filled English number that has more of words that vent out the frustration in the singer than give some solace to the singer. May be the music  can transport me away from my low spirits or something for sometime, but it doesn’t give me any peace of mind.

 How singers put in their heart and soul into the song to make it such a great masterpiece itself wonders me. I always feel How time stands still for me when musicz plugged in  !!!

Heavy holiday meal, air conditioned room and a relaxing environ to just sit and do your work leisurely… Ideal work environ for me… Sometimes it makes me wonder how I have been evolving constantly.. I spent all my growing years in a close knit family with so much of love and affection to consume that I always felt I would get obese with all the good traits they were passing on to me…  

I would be lying if i’d say it was making me better everyday. I grew to be very dependent on my family for my mental strengths and everything when it came to taking things head on in life. Things changed and today I am more than happy to call myself the member of a Global family!  

Today, we are scattered all around the world i’d rather say(coz i consider even the lane next to my home also to be a part of the world ). We seldom speak.It is all  about me and mom these days.

How we wake up at sevens and eights these days and how we smile and fall back to sleep daily. Rewind ten years, we used to react so differently to the same situation-Wake up rush about with chores and rush to our respective worlds-schools and offices.

How we skip nutritious food and binge on junk stuff at times these days. 

How an unopened mail blinking in the inbox from my dad brings a smile back onto my tensed face during exams..He is growing up to be a techie freak too these days congrats pa.

How an offline from my twin calls me with my nickname….

How my niece’s screams make me go ga ga over her again and again… The best valentine gift I ever got. I am happy I never got committed to anyone else before and today am happy with the gift i got on the best 14th feb of my life.

Rewind ten years again , I used to cry badly if my dad returned late from work(These days I am suprised if he returns early:D).

How I got scared if my sister got angry at me…Now a days it worries me if she isn’t angry at times  

All those years I spent growing each day with increasing love and addiction towards my family, most of my waking hours used to give me a constant fear- What happened if we all had to part ways in future.

Today it doesnt bother me much even though I spent most of my days alone. I dont miss them.May be I should thank TECHNOLOGY  for that.May be because I am able to stay in touch with them so much that I have been able to compose myself better in their absence too. And ya Me and My Sister- We fight bad these days too.Thank god itz in e amils now….thank god her office networks are not permitting messenger’s usage or she would yell at me on call and ya mobiles have jammers ) and the arguments are endless.Still IT helps us avoid exertion due to stress.. we beat the stress out on key boards and ya we have good biomechanics so no worries, fingers are still in good shape. BTW akka i presume your doing your hand exercises

And ya Momz learning to SMS these days another big relief for me .She managed a TINCKU for THANK YOU the other day…(that too with the T9 on )

how does it really feel to be jolted out a wonderful slumber on a beautiful rainy evening… TERRIBLE… and it happened to me today… I really never understand to why my mother thinks i relax too much in life  

she pulled me out of the bed to accompany her to the vegetable market!!! and ya i was loving it…the muddy puddles, adjoining fish market, the stinky rotting vegetables dumped everywhere! i was cursing myself badly and i had given enuf of looks to my mother who was oblivious of my anger.there was no point. i yielded to her demands and walked out of the car to carry the bags. I wasn’t at all liking it. 

Enter the market, CROWD!!! wow this was the icing on the cake! 

And what startles me is the way people carry their bags dropping them onto floor even without checking if someonez foot is under it…grrrr….. i had one aunty’s atleast 10kg shopping bag on my foot for a minute atleast till she finished with her fight for a torn five rupee note. 

I sometimes feel may be GOD customizes the situations for me with a secret “lesson of life” weaved in it
I really love my mother’s dedication when it comes to shopping for vegetables. She goes around the market for a survey first, then comes the second round when she will shop for all the big and heavy veggies and then the leafy veggies at the last ( she doesnt want the leaves to have creases or get broken under the heavy veggies- note tht when u go shopping next time )  

one round through the entire market,  i was done and totally off… hungry …exhausted…

One turn around the bendiwala, i came across this ten year old doing his homework under the lightbulb and he was lending a hand to his handicapped father to sell  potatoes. The scene made me stop and have a look.I was so ashamed for a minute. What was i complaining for? 

We moved on..from then on I looked at every seller with more intent. Every seller’s face looked as though it has a story to tell. Every face that looked at me was asking me What was I complaining against in life???

I dint have to wait for the rains ,

I dint need to wait for the officials to open the market gates every morning to sell my crop,

The political scenario and crash of money market never decided my meal frequency….

May be I have become too philosophical in life for all that God blessed me with!

Call it anything, but I say I have got BETTER with everything.I am a BETTER human today and i dedicate all the best things that happen to me today to all the problems that made me THINK!!

Problems that made me THINK…

Problems that  made me BETTER…

There were days when I sat and thought if I’d ever receive any help!!!! Ya I learnt it hard way that life is full of mazes and puzzles while I was here, stuck in a maze at a dead end .I always did what most of us do. I kept asking myself Why me!!!!

I always did fail to ask myself another question !!! Why not me !!! I know it puzzles some of you to why I should have thought so. Here I was facing one of the biggest challenges of my education phase, stuck in a situation that was affecting me badly.The world is filled up to the brim with more serious problems like poverty and hunger , I do not wish to put my tiny complaint high above them all and so  I  shall not discuss my situation here in detail…

I was here fighting against one organisation and the situation was getting more and more like Me Vs Them

During the initial stages of my fight I always asked myself the wrong question,

“why me?”

I wasn’t looking at how many ways the problem was helping me.I was fighting against the organisation everyday but everyday was another war for me against my flaws.

I was trying to better myself every minute I spent there. Why ????
I dint want to give them even a single chance against me .

I started taking my hobbies more seriously. I started improving at a pace where  my family even thought I might end up shifting my career to being a photographer than a therapist. 

One day I stop and look back at all those sleepless nights I cried out on the pillows to why I was the only one who is suffering.I am surprised at the progress I’ve made. I am surprised at how best the problem has chiselled my talents.

How “the problem” nurtured me carefully like a mother from an immature rebel kid to a mature independent young lady.

The problem for me at a time was everything that associated me with that place. Everything that sent me back to that place.

The situation, the people who were responsible for it, the people who had the power but refused to help me!!!

But when I started looking for a solution with more desperate measures, I realised the solution was within me!

I was not noticing what the problem was helping me become!

There were days I got kicked at in my study place! There were days my things went missing at the right time I needed them. All these caused me a lot of pain though not physically the trauma was badly cutting through my heart.

It all hurt me because I wasn’t in a situation to question them back.

There came a day when someone told me it was the rule of life… the rule of karma!

I was supposedly doing my share of karma that i chose for before god put me onto this earth.I was to do my share of suffering to enjoy my share of happiness.I will not categorise it under any name, religious , spiritual or superstitious belief.. I will only call it a belief!!!! For all the reasons and explanations that I received from countless people when I approached them for help this one made a lot of sense to me!

But everytime I started analysing and linking up one good incident and one bad challenge I was facing, I was enjoying the analogy more and smiling at my own foolishness of choice rather than feel bad!

I chose to get kicked in exchange of a DSLR????? (That is one of the best gifts I ever received!!) OMG!!! What was I doing when God gave me that MCQ sheets to choose the Good and Bad incidents of life!!

The problem hasn’t vanished even today … No miracles took place! No saviour angel appeared!!!

Every time I face a blow at that place! I wait a second and recollect one best thing that is right now happening in my life and I end up laughing at my own foolishness of choice!!! 

The power of laughter and happiness gives me double the strength to stand up against them yet another time.I wonder it still pisses them off to how I am still Happy

Mr. T.K.Srinivasan

Originally uploaded by Madhu Gopalan

I have always looked forward to interacting with people like Mr Srinivasan. What suprises me are their humble mannerisms and the “i am just another guy” attitude.
Why is this that these people dont make it to the list of the best indians of the year, decade or whatever that people always keep hyping about?
Don’t we need to know more about them ?
Don’t we have anything to learn from them ?
Isn’t there anything for us to inculcate into ourselves from their lives????

I am so very happy to know that people like Ms Gopalan take time out to write about these “very rare gems” that lay scattered around us and yet!! we fail to take a step ahead and push them up the ladder of fame and recognition.